Sometimes catalysts are so powerful that a series of events is ignited and I almost forget where or when it started. Sometimes they're so subtle that shift after shift after shift comes and thinking back, I have no idea where it all began. This is both.
For all intents and purposes, this story both starts Friday, October 20, 2017 and four plus years ago. The beautiful thing is it doesn't matter, I am here now.
I am in Divine Feminine Goddess Training.
The universe helped me see this clearly and consciously through a phone conversation with my dear friend Laura. She was describing a tree where the branches split into two, then one comes back across, forming a circle-like shape. Behind half of the circle is another branch, blocking the view, so light passes through half and not the other half. When I saw the picture of the tree, I knew exactly what it was, a yin/yang symbol. The ultimate paradox of being human, the light and dark within us all.
See, prior to this, I have been on a journey out of the darkness and into more and more light for four plus years since experiencing extreme heartbreak and falling deep into a cave. I began navigating my way out, one step at a time and with each step I took, I found more light from my heart and soul. Along the way I've gathered wisdom, removed layers of my ego, healed wounds from this lifetime and many past lifetimes, and gathered coaching and healing tools that have been tried and true for myself and I know will help others immensely as well.
I have experienced so much along the way; each chapter has been fascinating and full of soul food. Today, the story that's ready to be told is that of my Twin Flame connection. I am at a vista where I have an entirely new view and perspective and thus am ready to begin describing the landscape.
When I first experienced connecting with my Twin Flame in human form, I had no idea about anything pertaining to spirituality. I was a skeptic at best. After the relationship with my Twin Flame ended and I found myself deep in the cave, I was so overcome with sadness, regret and despair, I blamed my heart for loving so fully. Two weeks in, this pain was so immense I realized I had it all wrong, what I felt in my heart was real and I began to allow my heart to guide me. It asked me to listen closely, this relationship wasn't like anything else I had experienced and it wasn't like what I was seeing reflected back to me in the outside world. In order to understand, I would need to go within.
This is a wonderful message and a universal Truth, that we have all of the answers within. However, my ego wasn't ready to give up full control, thus beginning a four plus year battle with my heart for the driver's seat. Life can feel tricky to navigate because I value wisdom immensely and that includes the wisdom within myself and the wisdom of others. I want to trust myself fully and completely, and that also means being able to listen to others' perspectives and truly know what is meant for me and what is not. In this case, I feel that Glennon Doyle's words could not be more true "Stop asking other people for directions to places they've never been." Over time I've learned to listen to myself deeply, mostly the wisdom of my body as it always knows where my truth lays.
As you can imagine, I have experienced every various type of terrain on this four plus year journey, from caves and underground rivers to cliffs descending into the ocean and open green prairies. I've star gazed and prayed to the moon and I've gotten sucked in by the rip tide and thrown around on the ocean floor. All of this, every single moment, every single day, a part of a carefully designed and orchestrated plan by my soul.
Then Friday, October 27th occurred, I walked into a crystal shop and an aquamarine called to me, a stone for opening your throat chakra and speaking your truth, and also my birthstone. I knew it was for me. I then walked into the back room and there was a giant Quan Yin statue and a whole alter dedicated to her. She is a manifestation of the Divine Mother, a goddess of light, compassion and forgiveness. I knew she was now with me for the next stage of my adventure. After purchasing a "Wild Kuan Yin" oracle deck, I began learning more about her and I learned that her Twin Flame is Lao Tzu. I think I googled "do all ascended masters have Twin Flames?" and was led to the most amazing site that gave me everything I need for the next stage of my journey.
At this point, you may be thinking "what is a Twin Flame?" It is believed to be one soul that divided and is now manifested in two bodies. Hence the reason that being with this person feels like home. (If you're curious if you've met your Twin Flame, here's a quiz). These souls come to Earth with a particular mission: to uplift consciousness through unconditional love. Each twin's soul provides experiences so they may purge any lower frequency energies, heal wounds, and uplift their vibration to be a match with unconditional love.
The shift I have made over the past week is knowing that my mission is to fully step into knowing that I am a Divine Feminine Goddess and it is my birthright to fully embody this energy. This is how I will fulfill my soul's purpose in this lifetime. By me fully embracing myself as a Divine Feminine Goddess, I can help heal, coach, guide, and teach others to do the same, based upon their own wisdom and their own soul guidance. We are all Divine Love in human form and it is time for us to fully embrace this Truth.
You may be thinking, so what about your Twin Flame? I now fully know, honor, and trust that the Twin Flame bond (a cord of unconditional love between heart chakras) is the universes' to manage. My job is to fully step into and embody my wholeness, my uniqueness, my voice, my mission. Everything else flows from there. This is a complete act of faith and trust and one that has demanded my ego accept a demotion to the back seat of the vehicle. My heart is driving and my soul is riding shotgun as the courageous and trusted navigator.
I am here and I am ready.